The Darndest Things II

* "Mommy, don't sing in the car please. You don't have a very good voice." OUCH!

* JACOB: Mommy, when Sophia gets older, can she pee in the pot and win a sucker too?
MOMMY: Yes.
JACOB: But first she has to grow a penis.
MOMMY: Well, Sophia won't ever have a penis. She has a vagina.
JACOB: But I have a penis.
MOMMY: Yes, boys have penises and girls have vaginas.
JACOB: Mommy? I hope someday I have a vagina.

* After throwing his Jackbo (his teddy bear) and blanket down the stairs...
MOMMY: Jacob, that's not how we treat our friends. Jackbo and blanket feel really sad that you just threw them down the stairs.
JACOB: Mommy, blanket doesn't even have a mouth, so he can't be sad. But I guess I can say sorry to Jackbo.

* "Mommy, I need to rest. My legs hurt from all the hard work I've done today."

* Jacob is fond of wearing his winter boots...even when it's in the 80s and humid. After some time playing outside with his boots on, we came in for lunch. I asked him to take his boots off and wash his hands. After struggling to get his boots off for a few minutes, I hear him say under his breath, "Well, this is just ridiculous!!"